Inspired by numerous other blogs, I am happy to release to the world the secrets of my high-tech betting setup.
Yes, it may look like a laptop sat on a cabinet in my lounge, but it has a number of special features.
Note the space available for my tea mug. I am looking to upgrade to a quad mug-stand, which will allow me to drink multiple cupfuls during a session. Note also the memory stick attached to the laptop. This has a nice blue light on it which counteracts the green complexion I sometimes take on after a 1.01 punt starts to go awry.
I also have a lead at the back which plugs into a socket in the wall and gives me 'broadband', a service which gives me streaming pictures of sports events between the hours of 10.00am and 5.00pm, and 11.00pm till bedtime. Sadly, at peak times, the bloke they pay to wind up our telephone exchange gets a little tired and I can watch a little white circle spinning round a screen in lieu of the live sport.
Finally, just off shot to the right I have a nice widescreen TV capable of showing various sporting events from around the globe. Sadly, many of these clash with 'Coronation Street', '10 Years Younger' or 'Loose Women', and unfortunately a legal agreement I entered into 13 years ago stops me from controlling what is shown on the TV.
This arrangement allows me to back or lay sums of money in the knowledge that I am at a disadvantage to those who have fast systems and technology in place. So hopefully my knowledge of sport and ability to count will be just enough to allow me to make a profit.